1. This enormous family that I was born into. When we got together the other weekend in DC, the conversation inevitably directed itself towards pooping, as it always does. My 15 year old cousin looked a little sheepish, and I said “girrrrl, this is your family, this is what they talk about.” My uncle, who also thought animal crackers were dog treats, piped up and said “Hey! Everybody eats, so everybody poops!” Yes. Thank you for that eloquence, YC.
2. Earnest Earnest. Having him in my life didn’t really pan out the way I thought I was going to, but I’d rather have a dog I love than a shitty husband. AMEN!
3. This song by Selena Gomez. The video gave me nightmares after I watched it, but the song’s pretty catchy, and I also really like Selena Gomez a) because she’s a cougar and b) I once took a celebrity sibling test and it just so happened that Selena Gomez and I are soul sisters.
4. Okay, well, it wouldn’t be Thanksgiving if I didn’t thank the baby Jesus for all my wonderful friends. So, thank you friends, for being my friends, for being the individualistic, driven, honest and adventurous bunch that you are. I love you all as if you were my own litter of puppies.
Speaking of puppies, if you read about the “animal crackers” then it may entertain you to know that my uncle asked HAC AGAIN yesterday to clarify. “So these, they’re not for the dog?”