Something happened to me yesterday.

I was walking home from work, crossing 2nd Ave, when a delivery boy was riding full speed, towards me. Having once ridden a bike, I understand the logistics. Every person on a bike thinks they have the right of way and is kind of lazy, as in, it’s too much work to come to a complete stop at a red light, so they try to get through lights when no traffic is coming, or swerve around pedestrians.

 

I stopped dead in my tracks. I figured he would blow by me. Instead, he slammed on his breaks and screamed…

“Don’t worry! You’re too gorgeous for me to hit you!”

Some women would be flattered by this. I was fucking disgusted, turned to glare at him, gave him my poopy diaper face, and continued on my way.

What, if I had been ugly he would have hit me? What the fuck kind of thing is that to say? I hope he got his pant leg caught in his bike chain.

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